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  • Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 15. 2013 05:51


TG_Salihreis

We all know or heard about Nazi V2 missiles, Maus tank, Vampir night vision device and other goodies from WW2. What about British Secret Weapons?

 

I just come across a secret weapon of British, back from ww2. Unlike many other weapons, which are usually intended to damage materials and cause casualities, It's intended to get the enemy on their kneels, by softening the man inside the enemy soldiers' heart.

 

These secret weapon is called kitten-ammunition, much like the CBRN warhead shells, the kitten-warhead contains a steel casing with kittens inside, covered in soft materials like cotton and other fillings.

 

Upon impact on enemy territory, the steel casings would break open and tiny kittens, which arrived safe in the cotton-like soft fillings of the shell, get out.

 
They start soft and cute meows and yawns to attract the enemy soldiers. When enemy soldiers closed upon the zone of impact to see what's going on, they are immediately captured by the effects of the kittens and they would soften up to a point that they lose all the manhood inside them.

 

After the battlefield trials, the effects were found to be devastating. Victims were of no fighting value, only hugging and petting the soft, warm and fury projectiles. Often mothering the projectiles with passion and care, targets were emasculated.

 

Soon later, the Germany found about this and they needed some form of a cure to bring the casualities back to battlefield. German scientists come back with a solution. The victims of kitten-ammunition were to be treated with injections of high doses of testesterone.

 

Below is a photo of an artillery officer loading kittens into shells.

 

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 15. 2013 09:53


myg0t1

i lol'd

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 18. 2013 17:23


BA101stAD

That changed quickly

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 18. 2013 18:37


rocketeer1

I was expecting the German response to be para dropped German Sheppards onto the kitten training grounds.

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 19. 2013 01:54


SaseCaiBlele

Originally Posted by rocketeer1

I was expecting the German response to be para dropped German Sheppards onto the kitten training grounds.

 Japan made flea bomb :) to bomb kitten training grounds.

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    08. 19. 2013 21:58


dolfie999

we the australian were sneaky pardropping dropbears/koalas on the japanese

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    09. 06. 2013 17:18


TG_Salihreis

Originally Posted by dolfie999

we the australian were sneaky pardropping dropbears/koalas on the japanese



Koala ammunition should've been as cute and fury as kitten ammunition. While koalas lack the meows, someone should consider the hugging effect of koalas.



Also, yo people might wanna check this out:

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Kitten_Huffing
.

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    09. 12. 2013 17:20


Overlord77

I kind of feel bad for the kittens. Wouldn't they die, because of the impact, or was it like low velocity? The kittens would never survive, the shock could kill them, the impact could kill them, and the could even suffucate


How did this work? 

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    09. 12. 2013 23:39


dolfie999

Originally Posted by Overlord77

I kind of feel bad for the kittens. Wouldn't they die, because of the impact, or was it like low velocity? The kittens would never survive, the shock could kill them, the impact could kill them, and the could even suffucate


How did this work? 



  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    09. 13. 2013 04:06


Dragon_Boats

  • Re : Secret British Weapon - Kitten Ammunition

    09. 14. 2013 10:59


TG_Salihreis

Originally Posted by dolfie999

Originally Posted by Overlord77

I kind of feel bad for the kittens. Wouldn't they die, because of the impact, or was it like low velocity? The kittens would never survive, the shock could kill them, the impact could kill them, and the could even suffucate


How did this work? 




"warhead contains a steel casing with kittens inside, covered in soft materials like cotton and other fillings." the soft fillings were to work like an airbag, which is found in modern cars.


Also, cats are known to be able to resist high G forces.

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